Reduce frustration and misunderstandings with this technique
Do you ever feel like people are walking all over you? Do you find yourself constantly giving in to others, even when you don’t want to? If so, then it’s time to learn about assertive communication. Assertive communication is a way of communicating that gets your point across without making other people feel attacked or defensive. In this blog post, we will discuss the difference between assertive, aggressive and passive communication and how you can start using assertive communication in your own life!
Passive communication is a form of communication where the message is indirectly communicated through actions or behaviors rather than being directly communicated through words. Passive communication can take many forms, but some common examples include passive-aggressive behavior, closed body language, and a dismissive tone of voice. Passive communication is often used when the person wants to avoid conflict or confrontations and can create misunderstandings and miscommunication.
For example, I have a friend who doesn’t tell me when she’s upset with me. I know she’s upset because she resorts to one-word answers when I ask her questions. It’s impossible to resolve issues when we refuse to speak about them openly. It’s important to be aware of how you’re communicating and what your intentions are when using passive communication. Otherwise, you may end up frustrating or even angering the person you’re trying to communicate with.
Aggressive communication is a form of communication that is characterized by a hostile or aggressive tone. It is often used to control or intimidate the other person. Aggressive communication can take many forms, including yelling, name-calling, and threats. It is important to remember that there are more effective ways to resolve conflict or achieve your goals than aggressive communication. In fact, it often makes things worse.
Unfortunately, I’ve used aggressive communication, particularly with my family. The results are always poor. It leads to more escalation and hurt feelings. If you use aggressive communication, try to take a step back and consider other ways to express yourself. You may be surprised at how much more effective assertive communication can be.
When it comes to assertive communication, the most important thing is to be clear and direct. That doesn’t mean being rude or aggressive, but it means saying what you mean and ensuring that your needs are met. It’s also important to be aware of your body language and tone of voice. If your assertive communication comes across as angry or threatening, it’s likely to do more harm than good. Instead, try to stay calm and confident and focus on speaking clearly and concisely. If you can do that, assertive communication can be a potent tool.
Learning to speak assertively was very difficult for me, but after spending seven years around Germans, I’ve found a good balance. Canadians are super polite by nature. We don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. In Germany, I’ve learned not to be afraid to speak when I don’t like something or when I feel like something is unfair. I do so respectfully, and people tend to respond positively.
The benefits of assertive communication
Assertive communication is vital for getting what you want in life. When you’re assertive, you can stand up for yourself and express your needs clearly and concisely. This type of communication is essential for both personal and professional success. Assertive communication allows you to set boundaries, express your opinions, and assert your needs in a way that is respectful and non-aggressive. This type of communication is important for building healthy relationships, achieving goals, and asserting yourself in difficult situations. While assertive communication can be daunting at first, it’s a skill you can learn with practice. If you’re looking to be more assertive, check out my Speaking Mastery course designed to help learners become better communicators. Assertive communication is an essential skill that will help you throughout your life; it’s worth taking the time to learn how to do it effectively.
The bottom line
So, what is the bottom line? You need to become more assertive to be an effective communicator. This doesn’t mean becoming aggressive or passive – it means learning to express yourself clearly and confidently. Contact me today if this sounds like something you would like to work on. I would be happy to help you become a more assertive communicator. And who knows? You may find that your career takes off in a whole new direction as a result!
Questions to consider
- What is assertive communication?
- What are the benefits of assertive communication?
- How can I communicate assertively?
- What is the difference between assertive and aggressive communication?
- What is the difference between assertive and passive communication?
- How do I assertively handle difficult conversations?